blood makes noise ((ginny))

What had gotten into him? Why didn't he just do it? Why couldn't she just be the one to cower in fear for once? What was he going to do now?

Obviously, the natural thing to do was find a place to hide that somebody would be unlikely to find him at and message Lien to come over so he could calm down and get it all out of his system. James wound up in the Forbidden Corridor as it was a part of the castle he, surprisingly, hadn't spent much time in. His invisibility cloak was still wrapped around his form as he pulled out his crystal from his trouser pockets. He felt tremors from all of the power he didn't really use in the past and all of the power he didn't carry through with using. His crystal dropped to the floor as his arms shook. James felt as if he was ready to scream. He should've just dropped out weeks ago. He and Lien both needed out of Hogwarts.

Yet he found himself feeling glued to the ground as his knees collapsed onto the floor.

Tears fell from his face as he began to sob.

What was wrong with him?

@Ginny Potter

After marching around the castle in various places while students watched her in bewilderment, Ginny questioned Professors - children - family members alike. None of them had seen James. She felt frantic about what was said: something about him pointing his wand at Alayna Nott, perhaps a threat being made? She didn't know - she just wanted to find him. Turning a corner, she thought she heard someone sobbing. Although it was at a distance, her instincts told her that it was her son. She kept twisting through the corridors until she arrived at one that was abandoned nowadays.

There was a blue stone on the floor, catching the light and shining back at her. She made way towards it.

"James..."

Kneeling down, she reached out blindly, trying to grasp the material of Harry's cloak. He had to be underneath it. Instead of pulling it off him, however, she buried herself beneath it with him. She put her arms around him. "Shh... it's okay. It's okay, James. I'm here with you." She pulled him against her tightly, embracing her son.

@James Potter

His heart was racing as his brain played over and over what could've happened had he followed through with cursing Alayna. It played over the events of the moments before. Why did nobody answer his very valid question on why Alayna couldn't be the one to fuck off for once? Why did people in the room treat her as if she was some defenseless innocent flower when she asked for it? All she had to do was leave him and Lien be. All she had to do was not mess or talk any shit about Lien, but she could never stop herself. It disgusted him.

Then he felt a sudden tightness clinging to his body. Did Lily follow him out? Nah, her grip wasn't that tight.

Wait - was that his mum?! What was she doing here? James glanced up from the floor as he was pulled into an embrace. He wasn't necessarily in the mood to be touched by anybody except Lien, but he couldn't bring himself to fight or argue with his own mother.

"Mum..?"

@Ginny Potter

"That's right, it's me..."

She rubbed over his back gently, then drew back, pushing his hair back behind his ears, so she could see his face. Ginny never wanted to think ]I have a broken child, she never wanted to think he would break and do something unforgivable, but now she was at her limit of allowing him to continue on as he was. She didn't want to hit him with that right away though. James was clearly too distressed.

"Can you tell me what happened?"

She smiled patiently at him, adjusting her position on her knees. It wasn't the most comfortable position to be in.

@James Potter

Tell her what happened. Tell her what happened. He already knew that he'd have to see Professor Riddle in the near future regarding the incident, but now he had to recall all of it to his own mum. Great. Just bloody great. He was hoping to tell Lien all about it first to get his thoughts and process it, but that wasn't his luck.

James blinked as he attempted to think of a way to explain it to his mum.

"Alayna's been bothering Lien and I for months. We've been telling her to leave us be, but she won't. She bloody refuses to as she just wants us to suffer."

I want her to suffer more.

"Well, not long ago, she bloody tried to be all seductive to my bloke and trying to piss him off and shit like that. Why? 'Cause she has nothing better to do. And I got upset 'cause she crossed a red line I told her repeatedly to not cross."

I want her to wilt.

"She pushed my buttons and crossed my red line again by fucking acting as if Lien's a bloody coward when he ain't. I wanted to transfigure her into a pig."

Bloody animal she is. She's lesser than an animal.

There was a dark fire in his eyes as he smirked thinking about his next move.

"Instead, I summoned a snake to go after her 'cause it ain't fun if-"

He blinked realizing that if he was completely honest about it, it would be a bad look on him.

"She blocked that. Bit of a blur really, but I put up a defensive shield, y'know, 'cause I've been afraid for weeks that she was gonna pull some shit to me when she had the best opportunity to."

I want her defenseless.

"She kept insulting me saying that I was doomed to be a druggie deadbeat dad when I've been bloody sober for weeks now. I couldn't take much more of her shit! She's fucking delusional! So I aimed my wand towards her womb. Just an intimidation tactic."

I should've done it. I should've made her a barren hag.

"I wanted her reign of terror to end. I wanted it to end permanently, mum..."

@Ginny Potter

Ginny listened to James, nodding occasionally, but staying quiet and keeping eye contact with him. When he had finished, she wasn't worried about what he ended with. There were many times when she, and her husband, had felt the same way about someone. Sirius Black, Peter Pettigrew, Draco Malfoy, Severus Snape. With the exception of Wormtail, all had redeemed themselves in certain ways.

She could empathise with how he was feeling.

"I know something of how you feel," she said quietly, "But I know that if you ever did anything to Alayna that would seriously harm her, you would regret it for the rest of your life. She might not ever change, and she might not ever stop harassing you and Lien. You just need to find a way to change your way of thinking when that happens, so that you don't have an outburst that could cost you more than your place at Hogwarts."

"Dark thoughts can be thrilling. I know that. You can easily allow them to fill you up and take command, but it takes real strength to blot them out."

She smiled weakly at him.

"When I was possessed by Voldemort's diary, the darkness was both terrifying and exciting. It was as though there was suddenly a quick answer to all my problems, and those really hazy days where I walked around with only his voice to soothe my thoughts - those were some of the easiest, most stress-free days I had ever had. I know I was only eleven years old at the time, but I was still aware of my own conscience telling me how wrong it was. It was a very, very faint light. But it was there. You have that same part of your conscience, or you wouldn't be so emotional as you are now."

"You're not afraid of what she's going to do. You're afraid of what you might do, if she does. And in that, you become a bit of a self-fulfilling prophecy. Your fears are manifesting before you, because you just want everything to end quickly."

She breathed out slowly.

"I want to take you out of Hogwarts for a while, James. I know you hate the idea of it - but if you could learn ways of dealing with all the people who are going to cause problems in your life - by talking to one of the mind healers at Mungo's. The time away could help you rejuvenate. I know you want to be a good Father, and you will be, but this environment isn't good for you."

Smiling, she touched his arm and stroked it soothingly, trying to see any trace in his eyes that could indicate an understanding between them.

@James Potter

There was no way he'd ever regret hurting Alayna Nott as long as it meant that he wouldn't be forcibly ripped away from Lien or his kid, once it was born anyway. She needed taste of her own medicine, and he wanted to witness it in some form. It'd be satisfying. Be a bitch, experience the consequences. Nobody would have to put up with her had Lien followed through with drowning her. James even briefly thought of a way it could happen with ample plausible deniability.

He didn't desire to hurt anybody that badly except Alayna and, to an extent, her rat dog Ptolemy. Much of his mother's words went in and out of his ears as if there was no mind being given to them. It wasn't like his mum would understand his situation at school in-and-out like that; they were from different times. Her classes had less people and occurred during wartime. His classes feature an uptick in wizarding population and numerous years of peace. In some ways, the nepotism and favoritism only worsened.

He perked up upon the proposal of pulling him out. Holy shit. A free pass to drop out? James had to stop himself from looking so ecstatic and surprised. No need to figure out how to bring up the idea of dropping out this time!

"Yeah, it's sorta hard to focus on becoming a father in this environment..."

That sounded natural enough. With the reasoning his mum gave, maybe Lien could also use it so they could drop out together. He didn't want to be so far away from Lien if either of them could help it.

"I could take parenting classes and not worry 'bout library due dates..."

He smiled at his mum.

@Ginny Potter

She smiled at him, feeling relieved.

"It will only be for the remainder of the school year. You can come back next September. But..."

He was talking about parenting classes, which she didn't know existed in the Wizarding world but would certainly enquire into the matter.

"Please just tell me what I want to hear. You'll go and see the mind healer at St Mungo's?"

@James Potter

Little did his mum realize how happy he'd be to get away from all of the fuckers at Hogwarts. He was itching to get into the real world with Lien where there'd be nobody to bar them from accessing all of the forbidden knowledge they craved except for their own self-limitations. He could ensure they'd have the best tub on the market even if it may end up being custom-made. He'd find them a pad away from all the noise, all the media, all the pests in their lives. There was so much he had in mind so he and Lien could be happy and as stress-free as possible.

"Didn't I already tell ya I would?" James inquired softly with a hint of irritation. Oh, mum... Always a worrier! "Er, how soon will ya pull me out? Does dad know?"

@Ginny Potter

"I know... I just want you to know how serious it is that you do..."

Ah - her husband. Well... they had discussed some things about James, but she hadn't said about pulling him out of the school. Technically she was doing this without his consent, but she had to make him agree with it. James had to get the help he needed before he could return there. Once he had everything straightened out in his mind, he would do a lot better!

That's what she thought, anyway.

"Don't worry about Dad - I'll speak with him about it," she assured, "You can leave when you're ready to. It doesn't have to be until Christmas break. I'm sure I can have everything sorted with Professor Voclain before then."

@James Potter

"I know, I know..."

James hoped that it wouldn't be a waste of time for his mum's sake, but he really didn't know how the mind healers would help him. Scratching his head, he nodded. Harry was going to be so pissed when he found out. He emphasized staying in school due to how he had to drop out because of a war. It was infuriating how he never understood his point of view!

"Er do ya think grandmum will be upset 'bout it..? You know how much she cares about our educations!"

He at least wanted one relative other than his mum and Fred to be somewhat understanding about dropping out.

@Ginny Potter

There were many times that she had to step in and try to console her poor Mum. She was a bag of nerves. Ginny had to have got it from somewhere!

"When she knows that you will be continuing your education afterwards, I think she will understand. It may take a few months for you to benefit from the sessions, and then you'll be ready to return."

She smiled at him, sitting cross-legged instead of on her knees now. It was beginning to hurt to sit like that.

@James Potter

Except he didn't want to return to Hogwarts. He was already planning on raising the kid while Evelyn still attended Hogwarts so that at least one of them were there daily for the kid. As the expectation to child-rear usually fell on the mother, James didn't want Evelyn to have to stress over it when it was time to take the Hogwarts Express. He also just wanted to prove that he wasn't going to be anything near a deadbeat dad. Lien would also be graduating in a few months, assuming he wouldn't change his mind at some point, and he didn't want to be stuck at Hogwarts for another year. He wanted to be able to have more of the freedom and mobility to enjoy their relationship.

"Mum, I'm afraid 'bout Christmas this year..."

Although he was sure he'd have to go to the Burrow at some point, James found himself wanting to spend it with Lien's family instead. There, it'd be a lot quieter and less likely to erupt into some sort of fight between him and Al.

@Ginny Potter

"Al bloody hates me, mum. He really bloody hates me! And he loathes Lien too. I can't be completely comfortable knowing he's probably gonna blow up on me at any moment!"

It seemed to happen whenever they were in the same room nowadays.

@Ginny Potter