for your mind ((lily))

The cravings were hitting him so much more intensely today; whenever he didn't satiate them, he felt empty. Well, not really empty. Everything was more overwhelming, less dull. The various thoughts and memories that haunted him would eat at him viciously. If he didn't get something in his system, James would bite away at his lip until blood ran down his chin. It was exhausting.

James had gone into Moaning Myrtle's bathroom instead of class so he could feel normal again. He couldn't stand to feel deflated and serious when everyone expected him to be perky and upbeat. Sure, he naturally was those things, but it was hard to naturally keep up with it at Hogwarts or in public altogether. He stationed himself at one of the sinks further back as he put a magic bean into his mortar and pestle to crumble into a nice, fine powder. That was his favorite method of ingestion as he could always excuse his sniffles with allergies or, if he was feeling extra daring, a cold.

In his mouth was a cigarette that wasn't lit; there was something comforting about having such an object there. He pulled his hair back as he glanced down at the mortar and pestle with a smirk. He was going to feel better in no time.

@Lily Potter